Friday, July 15, 2011

Screaming In Silence: The List

The past few weeks have been especially difficult on me and my husband.  It is very humbling and difficult to look your kids in the eyes and say, “I’m sorry, sweetie, I can’t afford a birthday present right now.”  I have cried at night praying that God would give my children the desires of their hearts because I couldn’t! 

Even in the more important things, like our rent and utilities, we have struggled to stay afloat and have sacrificed on many things in order to maintain our home.  It is in times like these that I know I can’t share all of my circumstances with everyone.  I am not even sharing with you the complete scope of our life as it is 3 dimensional and much more complicated that most people can comprehend.  I have looked around, only to notice the absence of friends, which makes sense because Job only had three lousy friends when he was going through (not that my friends are lousy...they are SUCH a blessing and I thank God for them!).  I do want to make it clear that not everyone can hang with you through a storm.  Most people are busy with their own storms and that is very understandable.  I am not angry at those who are absent.  Just a bit lonely for some of them and miss their fellowship.

Nonetheless, in this particular storm, I find myself occasionally talking with random acquaintances, smiling and putting on a great show; a show that would put even Matthew Broderick (Ferris Bueller) to shame!  While nodding and talking about how cute the twins are and how big Donavon has grown, I reflectively think to myself, “If you only knew what I am dealing with… If you only could hear me screaming for someone to save me from this nightmare that is my life…”  I wonder, what would they say if they knew it all? 

Then I force myself to consider my list once again.  See, I have a list of concrete beliefs, things I know to be absolutely true!  It starts with the most basic and simple truth known to the Children of God.  When I am in confusion and chaos, I turn to this list of unchangeable, unmovable, and solid truths.  Because the list is so long, I will only list the top 10 most important truths.  BUT, as God reveals more of His truth to you, I encourage you to add to the list for yourself and see how God moves you through your storm!

The List:

1.       God created the heavens and the Earth.  He created me and therefore knows how I am to operate and function!  He has a plan just for ME!  (Genesis 1:1, Jeremiah 1:5, Jeremiah 29:11, Isaiah 55:9)

2.       He loves me unconditionally!  (John 15:13, John 3:16, Romans 8:35)

3.       He forgives us when we make mistakes!  (1 John 1:9, Titus 2:11, Psalms 86:5)

4.       He NEVER changes! He is constant and consistant!  (Hebrews 13:8, Revelation 22:13, Psalms 73:26)

5.       He will NEVER abandon me!  (Hebrews 13:5, Proverbs 18:24, Ezra 9:9)

6.       He will NEVER lie to me!  (Numbers 23:19, John 14:6, 1 John 2:4-5)

7.       All His promises WILL be fulfilled!  (2 Corinthians 1:20, Titus 1:2, Nehemiah 1:5)

8.       All of His promises are for ME, His servant who fears Him!  (Psalms 119:38, Ephesians 2:12-13)

9.       If I ask ANYTHING of Him, in His name, He will give it to me!  He will provide every need because I trust Him!  (Matthew 6:31-34, 2 Corinthians 12:9, John 15:7)

10.    He is coming back for ME so that I can be with Him for ETERNITY!  (Titus 2:13,  1 Corinthians 15:52, John 14:1-3)

1 comment:

  1. A word we all need to hear. Thank you for your transparency and honesty. You are a grace extending person.